Is That Grudge Adding Value to Life?

Think back to a time when you were really angry at someone - they disrespected you, made you cry, falsely accused you, tested your patience. You decided from that day on you’re never going to speak to them.

A mutual understanding and decision can definitely come out of confrontation and speaking about how each other is feeling. However if the opposing person is not understanding and acknowledging how you are feeling even after expressing yourself, keeping a grudge might still not be worth it. Let me explain.

Let’s be completely real, you don’t need to love everyone. If someone has done bad to you, you don’t need to hang out with them. You can just not associate with the person. If the person is toxic for you, your mental health; then it anyways doesn’t make any sense to associate with the person. You rather SHOULD 100% get away from that energy.

There’s this quote by Tupac Shakur which is describes this kind of circumstance so perfectly: “I want you to eat, just not at my table.”

~~~

Real Talk:

In another 15 years when you don’t even see the person anymore, what are you going to do with that grudge of yours?

When we all aren’t here anymore, what’s the use of that grudge? What value will that add to life? Not really any to be honest.

You don’t win a medal if you decide to be mad at someone your entire life! The real win is when you decide to move on with life and accept that there are just some people whom you won’t get along with. And that’s completely okay and normal!

There’s a difference with not associating with the person & moving on with your life; and disregarding the mental torture they gave you, forgetting everything and then becoming their best friend again - allowing them to take advantage of your kindness.

Just because they were your best friend or significant other and you guys had special memories together at one point, it in no way should justify you deciding to forget all of the mental torture they bogged onto you and act like all is okay, going back to them.

You don’t deserve to be friends or be with someone who does not care about how you’re feeling and disrespects you, even after expressing yourself. You don’t need to be, and should not be, dealing with someone who can’t respect your boundaries.

It is your right to be respected and if you don’t get that then that person may not be meant to stay in your life. It may hurt now, but long-term you will be in a much better state.

Moral of the story is that there really is no point of you holding a grudge with anyone. Nothing will come out of having that grudge kept inside of you other than just a lot of anger. Those memories and flashbacks of the disrespect will just keep coming back.

Whereas not holding a grudge, deciding to just disassociate and step away from the person and relationship; makes you the much bigger person without having that constant boiling anger inside of you.

General rule of life - as kind as you are, as many ways you try to speak to someone about how you’re feeling, you won’t get along with everyone! Can’t be everyone’s best friend, it’s just something you need to come to terms with.

“You forgave someone who wasn’t even sorry. That’s strength.”

- @ curvyladyprobs/ Twitter

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

That’s all for me this week, have a great day and I’ll see you very soon! If you haven’t already subscribed to my blog, please do! You’ll get a notification from myself directly sent to your email every time I publish a new piece. Click here and then scroll down a bit to go directly to the Subscribe button!

Take Care <3